bah-leet

Do not smile
Dear one
You'll wake the sleeping
for your smile brings out the sun

Do not open your eyes
Dear one
you'll wake the sleeping
for you eyes sing resounding joy

Be still
Dear one
for even your twitch is a ballet worthy of Ovation
that could wake the sleeping

Do not sing
Dear one
You'll wake the sleeping
for your song shakes the foundations

Do not laugh
Dear one
You'll wake the sleeping
for your laughter is infectious

Do not even speak
Dear one
for your words despell the coma

Thank you don

racing brain and sure
with Faith so pure of His plan
All I can follow to lead with closing door
this healing core

pieced together with love like glue
I praise you G-d. Moments strung together
I learn. self so stern, to myself to stern.
weighty work out
deep muscle burn

I weep dry
folding my face to Picaso sized comedy.
and laughter grows deep within.
bottom of the bin. my giftings gift
not so swift, but all the more in store
Big blessings abound!
Look around and Praise!
Our G-d Reigns!

shift

how Dare you.
Kendal, moonlight is not ordinary. you mislead. you distract. you lie
I shift
more pennies than words but (SHIFTING)

"these are not angelic Abrahams" with an accent of sleep. stretching for random but a boy's face at every turn
every turn
tear soaked and lost with hermit style homeland
(shifting)

"not joy but glee" further back to a start. and go strait. not left nor right cause its wrong
so wrong at every turn(shift)
"and brush" (Shift)

biting and harsh. Translation Point with in, locked up tight. to tight. fight and Fight
get loose, have lose, stop loss. Twist ropes. door knobs turn at every turn
every turn every turn, tear soaked. boy faced boy
not knowing not having but knotting (shift) and unknotting (Shift)
frayed and unfunny (SHIFT)
I am shiftless in this pool. i duck and wind
we all have sinned, so this is His Heart? I am unmade by boy faced boy
passing toy faced joy, forever. I smooth through with skill, inside ill.
Day by day I pray not prey. fluff and fold
I grow mold, but I seek soap. If His Heart is at every turn at every turn at every turn
such a burn! I stoke said heat "with skill"
I frame my beat "fluff and fold"
I am unmade yet His Heart stayed with mine
holding the line taunt. As I bound and reel to feel what I feel.
His Heart of love in sight
"Resounding as Loud as Light!"

of sleep

is afraid of sleep
the dreams, they hold power
they hold truth in HD.

waking from them
only more work, no rest
no mustard...plus confusion to shoe
i mean boot
to boot as in "on top of"

behind in time (i don't like mustard, but I could go for the counter top...PART!)
forcing the stream
resist least resistance.
extend beyond
step by itself
not alone but
breaking off

and the muscles draw in
breath in holding patern
jaw so sore
ducts so dry

and all the while
...
the roof leaks

greatest conquerd fear

172 and 9 is my current greatest fear
as the creek and grind of my minds gear
speeds faster than I can steer.

racing, rumbling and far to fast
far to often the boundry lines are passed.
Those thoughts I would UN cast.

there will not be any even score
"as much as you love now, you will love even more"
was whispered to my core

and I'm shedding this shiny fire
with raised hands I seek for something higher.
waxen ears gifted to The liar.

------
The call was good on Saturday
"I'm ready to hear what you have to say."
and all the fear did melt away.

and with that heat did melt my brain
so I struggled for composure to gain
and open I was once again

that simple hurt finding seal
Such deep and old pains began to heal
that I asked G-d "is this real?"

One string mending all my rope?
when it's viewed in G-d's wider scope,
faith, love coupled with Hope.

My love for chocolate...

I work at a gas station called QuikTrip. One of the ways I like interacting with my customers is to make 'clever' comments or puns based on statements they may be wearing at the time. For instance...Man walks in with a T-shirt that has the "I heart NY" printed on it. I say "do you love New York?" or "I think New york is pretty cool too." That being said I can begin the story:

A young woman enters the store. I have read her shirt before the door opens so as soon as she can hear me I say "Welcome to QuikTrip. I love Chocolate!" I say this because that is what her shirt said. She smiles in recognition of my statement and continues on with her day.

kind of a boring story eh? No real quirk to it. No reason to retell the story from my perspective. none at all. but lets take a look at it from the other employees perspective...

they are working. they are focused on what ever work it is that they are doing. They are not paying attention to who is entering or what their T-Shirt may or may not say. not one bit. They hear me say "Welcome to QuikTrip. I Love Chocolate!" They think "that's odd. he does not always say that. I wonder why it is that he said that." The they look up at me to see why I would make such a random declaration. and this is what they see

They see me. they see me looking at the customer. They then turn to look at the customer and they see a beautiful smile gracefully blooming upon an equally breathtaking face. A young woman that is very much the ebony to my ivory. A Nubian Princes she was!
Not one of my co-workers bother reading what her T-Shirt says at this point. Their heads snap back to look at me, and back to her. then to me again....They are shocked....They never thought I would...they are taken aback by how 'forward' I was....How out of character for me...stutter and stammer....

And I stand there trying to tell them I read a T-Shirt. It's no use. Perseption (sp?) is reality. So the rest of the day finds me greeting customers

"Welcome to QuikTrip, The darker the better!"

alter expectations

8-24-8

as time is short
I've not time to court which
word will work best.
But based on last nights dream, goodbye's will hurt
but the hurting is no hinderance to hitting, and that hard.
the closeness becoming distance and rightfully
so long
and drive safely and
sleep well
well
drive safely but don't sleep.
keep eyes open, recording and ready.

and I'll see you on my way out, when all will spout and poor forth
to translation point.

pending pending pending

I once had an asignment in college. Okay, I had many but there was this one that sticks out to me right now. I had to write a responce to an absurdist piece for a theatre class. I turned it in late, (big suprise) but I still got an A. this was because I wrote my responce in the language and form of the piece in question. it was absurd. Though I still love the absurd I have not found much comfort with my absurdity in the world of the written word.

My computer does not quite function at its peak right now. I have some very helpful friends that are working hard at fixing this and for this I thank them. (or will thank them when I see them...okay I'll likely have to call them...) This limits my access to the world wide web ergo my time on facebook has been limited.
the benefit:

that which is pending has bcome urgent.

this is true for a few areas of my life recently, and this is in some ways the center of all of them:

in regaurd to my comfort level with absurdity and my skills in writing:
to make the difficult, customary.
then make the customary, easy.
then make the easy, beautiful.

I'm in difficult.

dwelling on newly accessable brokeness

what can come?
spent salt, sun faded and 98.6...
a Princely Grandfather, perhaps
but not PG
off cliff, with us in tow

I recoil. restrict. resist.
and rail with in
to temper sins spread
tail need not shed such shadow

I'm wishing for warring
yes, you weeping type tyranny!
yet stale air saps Dawn Treader style sails
my vengeance fails
I hope to hug, though you hurt me
to encase you twixt my arms and remove the room that you inflicted

to love past this peril
and beyond blame.
pain not same, but of worthy weight
to show G-d is great.
bruising as I care
Healing is my prayer.
Though I'm blurred with tears
riddled with fears
and pounding pounding pounding out
with choice and worthy words,

I'd hug you
for days on end
till you hug back heartily.
I'd vine tight hug out this hurt
wrecked and ruined as I am,

I'll love you
for days, no end
till you love back, truly.
I'll vine tight love out this hurt
for G-ds glory.